April 01, 2004

--- So, we have some

--- So, we have some delightful Hollywood ridiculousness for you this
evening. The Day After Tomorrow

You can view the trailer here
So, it seems as if one massive worldwide storm hits. Pandemonium
ensues. The world is saved by a weather geek whose predictions no one
heeded! All is well in the end. "We will survive. We will go on." And
so on and so forth. Why does this big storm hit the our home sweet
home?
Why, global warming, of course. Climate change. Duh.

Now, just to be clear, I'll probably go and see it because I like big disaster movies. No, I didn't like Earthquake! No groovy CGI in those mid-70's disaster flicks. But this is directed by Roland Emmerich, who directed Independence Day
and I liked that movie. The man is good with projects that have serious
scope. That said, the husband and I will probably laugh our asses of
through all of the really good propaganda parts. Because, you know it's
gonna have some seriously good propaganda if their website is any
indication. While I can't link to said propaganda because it's all
stupid popups with really annyoing music, go to the profile of Director
Roland Emmerich and there should be a wee box at the bottom that says
"Weather Gone Wild." Click on that and it will come up with a few
sections, titled "The Present," "Future Predictions" and "What you Can
Do"
The Present: They talk about the heat wave in Europe last year---they
claim 20,000 people died. They talk about how last year was the year
that the most tornadoes ever were recorded---and how that record isn't
going to stand for long! Deadly floods are on the rise, with most of
the deaths from Cyclones coming from---gasp---inland flooding! Future
Predictions: 1.25 million species of plants and animals will be extinct
by 2050 as a result of global warming.
The Ice Cap of Mt. Kilimanjaro---already 75% gone---will be entirely
gone in two decades as a result of global warming.
"Say Goodbye to the Colorado Ski Season" Alpine meadow in the Rocky
Mountains will likely disappear as a result of global warming.
The Oriole will be extinct in most people's lifetimes due to declining
habitats brought on by global warming.
Montana's Glacier National Park will be devastated as global warming
melts its most prized feature.
Malaria and Dengue Fever will spread due to increased temperatures that
will help these water borne illnesses spread. And it's due to global
warming!
Venice will soon be viewed solely by gondola as rising water levels
threaten it and other cities, like New York, Buenos Aires and Tokyo.
It ends with a lovely little page. GLOBAL WAKE UP CALL. THERE'S MORE TRUTH THAN HYPE!

Ok, my question is: sez who? The movie makers? Sha. Right. Like they're the best and most accurate source out there. Whaddya
mean Salome didn't behead John the Baptist? You mean she only had it
done? She didn't do it herself? Oh, shit. Well, we can work around
that. What if John struck down the guy she sent to kill him? Yeah. And
then she's forced to do it herself. Wow. More drama there. We should go
with that!
From whom did they get their facts and can I really
consider them the best people to be blowing the horn on this when their
solution to the problem is to send me to this site? Where,for a whopping $504,
I can become "carbon neutral." Yes, by spending $504 they will plant
thirty trees to balance out my average North American excretion of 22
tons of CO2. Hence, I will balance out. Now, if I lived in Asia or India, I would only have to balance out 1.46 tons of CO2, hence it only costs $29.87. UK? 11 tons of CO2 at $252.13. Eastern Europe? 7.34 tons at $168.09. Middle East---surely
their CO2 levels are huge with all that cheap gas, right? Nope. 5.14
tons o' CO2 and a piddly $117.66 will rid them of any guilt they might
have over polluting the atmosphere and causing a rise in greenhouse
gases. Now, I don't know where they got their numbers and I really
don't care. It's not like I feel guilty over emitting CO2. I breathe. I
emit CO2 whether I want to or not. But I'm a pretty enviro-friendly
person on the whole, so why should I feel guilty in the first place? I
don't own a refinery. I rarely drive. I recycle. I turn off lights the
husband has left burning. I use mass transport. I've done more than my
fair share. I doubt I emit 22 tons of CO2 in a year, but it's not like
that matters. I'm still not going to pay good money to plant trees to
offset my very existence on this planet because Hollywood tells me I
should be worried about this problem. They can pucker up and kiss my
lily white ass. I do have a suggestion for Future Forests and the
makers of The Day After Tomorrow, however. If they really want to cut down on CO2 emissions: quit breathing. Yep. No more hot air from Hollywood. That should stop the problem right there and then.

Posted by Kathy at April 1, 2004 12:46 AM | TrackBack
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