--- God, don’t you just

--- God, don’t you just love it when a former Great White Hope endorses another?

Instead of calling it the Old Boys Network, I think they should call it the Great White Hope Network.

--- Go forth and sin no more, and while you’re at it, make sure you pull a few people along with you.

Nine hundred Islamic terrorists, some of whom are responsible for the deaths of fifty-eight
tourists at Luxor in 1997, are being released by the Egyptian
government, including one of their leaders who has espoused
non-violence in recent years, because it “…would help the
movement gain a political voice and could strengthen the hand of more
moderate Islamists in the Arab world's most populous country.”
Yes, the leaders of the group espoused a non-violent stance years ago.
But there was a schism in the group: some rejected the non-violence
stance and went down the Nile to Luxor and decided to bomb western
tourists who wanted to see the glorious ruins of Ancient Egypt. And
we’re supposed to believe, given the current political climate in
Egypt and the rise of fundamentalist Islam all over the world, that all of these guys are going to pull a Ghandi?

What utter bullshit.

“Analysts said it was more likely he {Zuhudi} was released to
allow his more moderate views to influence budding Islamists.”
Ok. Let’s see if I can come up with a comparable situation. {racking
brain} Ok, got it. Imagine an imprisoned Martin Luther; a Martin Luther
who recanted his 95 Theses in jail. Then imagine the Catholic Church
sending him on a PR mission throughout Germany and Europe, saying the
Reformation shouldn’t have happened; that they should go back to the
Church because he had it wrong and was admitting as much.

Just sink the hook into my mouth a little more and maybe I’ll bite.

To quote that immortal genius of a poet, Wayne Campbell: Sha, right. And monkeys might fly out of my ass.

And this doesn’t even get to the point that some of these assholes murdered fifty-eight people FIVE years ago. Yep. That’s right. They
murdered fifty-eight immoral western tourists to make a point about the
supposed ungodliness of all westerners and their governments and the terrorists
are getting a pass because the Egyptian government can’t control the
spread of militant Islamism. It’s a political move by Mubarak.
Murderers are being set free because Mubarak has no control over
what’s going on in his country. Fabulous.

--- Ok, so I promised movie reviews today, didn’t I?

- Friday night, Mr. H. and I ventured forth after dark and went to go see Underworld.
Mr. H. has a thing for vampires, so this was first on his must see
list. I mean, how can you resist a plot that claims to be about a war
between werewolves and vampires? You can’t. You’d be cutting
yourself out on some very good fun, so why bother? Resistance is
futile. But the notion is there, running rampant around the back of
your brain, that this movie could really suck and you’ll be out eight
bucks and left with nothing but a bad taste in your mouth. I know it
was there for me, but I couldn’t resist the whole notion of vampires
vs. werewolves, so away we went. And you know what? Despite some plot
holes you could have driven a Mack truck through, it was fairly decent.
Performances brought this thing back from the brink: everyone---with
the highly notable exception of Scott Speedman---was good. There was
some plagiarism, as well: they stole the idea of bullets with
ultraviolet light in them from Blade,
but it was ok. You forgave them because it was a good idea---why
shouldn’t the writers have turned it into bullets with silver nitrate
to kill werewolves? - Since the weather had turned cold, the husband
and I decided Saturday night would be a movie night, as well, only with
rentals. - Wasabi
was fun. It’s another film you needed to turn your brain off before
watching, but who cares? No one was trying to make a serious piece of
art with this film. Everyone was on the same page and the result was
delicious. It was fun.
I like Jean Reno. I also enjoy Luc Besson, the writer/director of La Femme Nikita
(no, not the TV show; the original film---if you haven’t seen it,
you’re a slacker whose opinion means nothing to me---you’re the
person who probably quotes Romeo and Juliet only after having seen Shakespeare in Love.
Learn your references.) and when the two of them team up, it’s always
good. - I have a wee bit of a Joe Fiennes fetish, and I can personally
attest to the fact he’s a nice guy, and wanting to support this very
nice man despite the fact there weren’t any critic quotes on the box,
I grabbed Killing Me Softly
on impulse. All I can really say is thank God it was free, because no
one should spend any money on renting this film. I’m seriously
contemplating scratching the DVD with the car keys before I return it
so the next person who rents it is saved from having to watch this
garbage.
I’m going to spoil it for you: it’s So I Married an Axe Murderer
dressed up as a sex thriller. Yep, that’s right: the sister has
possession issues about the brother and decides to off all his lovers,
although he has no clue about that part of it. Supposedly, they expect
us to believe that he’s that dumb. He can climb Everest, but everyone
he’s involved with either dies or disappears and he has no idea that
it’s his sister? Puh-leeze.
Poor Joe. You really shouldn’t have signed up for this piece of
excrement. Ugh. Thanks for showing us your butt, once again, however,
you shouldn’t have. You should have zipped up your pants and ran like
hell from this project. If you’ve got the hots for Heather Graham,
you should know that, once again, she does the full frontal thing in
this movie. (Can you say, “Tax deductible boob job,” boys and
girls?) I honestly am having a hard time trying to figure out why
people keep hiring her. She sucks, to put it bluntly. Sure she’s
pretty, but dear God, she’s horrible.
Ugh. She can’t act her way out of a paper bag. -Since we just finally
got a DVD player this year, every now and again, I rent a movie that
was beautiful on film, sucked on VHS, and would probably be gorgeous
again on DVD. The Last of the Mohicans
is just such a film. I love this movie, but it’s really very annoying
that the only DVD that anyone seems to have is the director’s
expanded edition. I don’t like the expanded edition. I want the regular one that was released in the theater. Yeah, I know. Usually it’s the other way around. Blade Runner and Apocalypse Now Redux
are better films than the originals, showing that most directors know
what they’re talking about when they fight to keep scenes from being
cut. Michael Mann, however, is not one of these directors.
Just scrolling the boards at IMDB, it seems I’m not the only one who
has this problem. One of my favorite lines was cut: “Someday, Major,
you and I are going to have a serious disagreement,” but a bunch of
junk that didn’t need to be there was thrown in for whatever reason.
I can understand why Mann thought the scene where Maj. Heyward created
a distraction to help get the courier to General Webb needed to be
included, because it must have been a bitch to shoot, but it really
didn’t need to be in the movie: it provided nothing essential to the
storyline. What really pissed me off was that they cut Clannad’s “I
Will Find You,” from the film and substituted some lame filler music
for that scene. Mann ruined
it. It went from being a scene where Nathaniel is desperately tracking
the woman he loves, to a scene where he’s just running up a hill.
Grrrrr

Posted by Kathy at September 1, 2003 02:54 PM | TrackBack