January 29, 2008

Memo Time

To: Any future dischargees I might handle sometime in the near future
From: Moi, your volunteer with the mostest
Re: Behavior

Dudes, seriously. It's not my fault if your ride shows up at the wrong door. Don't take the fact you have to wait a bit while we sort things out on me, eh? I'm just the girl with the wheelchair.

The same goes if your doctor prescribes you a drug with a whopping co-pay. Don't throw a fit in the discharge pharmacy and then lump me in with the pharmacist when you scream, "You're all just a no-good lot of bloodsuckers!"

Again, I'm just the girl with the wheelchair.

To: The Nurses
From: Moi, your volunteer with the mostest
Re: Transfers

People, I'm more than happy to give someone a wheelchair ride to wherever they need to go---really and truly, I am---but I can't do it if they have an IV attached. It's against regulations---and you know this because the job generally falls to you when this occurs. So, even if the guy is going to have his IV locked off sometime in the next half hour, don't call me until the IV is gone. Otherwise, I'm just standing around, when I could be doing something exciting. Like a blood bank run. The chances that Dracula could intercept me, and whisk me away to Transylvania for an eternity of blood sucking, decrease dramatically when you do this.

Posted by Kathy at January 29, 2008 04:20 PM | TrackBack
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