Asshat

Depending upon whom you chat with around here, Garrison Keillor is a savior, or he's a tremendous asshat. I don't think it'll come as a surprise to anyone when I reveal, right here, right now, that I side with those who think he's an asshat.

{...}Keillor and his wife, Jenny Lind Nilsson, are suing their next-door neighbor, Lori Anderson, to stop her from building a two-story addition to her home that would include a three-stall garage and studio.

The lawsuit, filed Monday in Ramsey County District Court, claims the addition would "obstruct the access of light and air to the Nilsson-Keillor property" and "impair or destroy protected historical resources."

Both homes in the 400 block of Portland Avenue are within the Ramsey Hill historic district.

The complaint also said the project would obstruct their view "of open space and beyond" and possibly hurt property value. The estimated market value a year ago for Keillor's home was about $1.2 million, according to property tax records; Anderson's was about $600,000.

The city also is named a defendant in the documents, which said Keillor and his wife were not notified of public hearings before a zoning variance was approved and the project was OK'd by the Heritage Preservation Commission.{...}

Get that? Keillor is not only suing his neighbors for blocking his view of an alley, but he's also suing the city of St. Paul because, ahem, he says he wasn't notified of public hearings.

Hey, jerkweed, public meetings are, by definition, open to the public, which means there was notice. Just because some city employee didn't come up to your door, ring the bell, a copy of Lake Wobegon (that he was just hoping and praying you'd have graciousness to autograph) in his trembling hands, doesn't mean that there wasn't notice. It just wasn't of the personal variety, which you, in your self-proclaimed position as arbiter of all things Minnesotan, would have undoubtedly preferred. This is the way it works for the rest of us. Why would you think you're immune?

"We were heartsick," Anderson said of learning about the suit.

Olson said when he and Anderson decided to marry, they realized their one-car garage wasn't big enough. Even before they hired an architect, the couple said they talked to neighbors. They planned to build three stalls, a storage area and a mudroom on the first floor and a studio for Anderson's business on the second. The addition would be a few feet lower than the existing home and would be attached to the rear.

The project would add about 1,900 finished and unfinished square feet to the home, which now has 2,124 finished square feet. The Keillor-Nilsson home has 5,168 finished square feet, according to tax records.

Anderson and Olson received a zoning variance for a 23-foot rear-yard setback rather than the standard 25 feet and conditional approval from the Heritage Preservation Commission, pending final approval of the plans.

{...}Olson said Monday that Keillor and his wife "couldn't have cared less" when Anderson told them they were building a bigger garage.

"He's a busy guy," Olson said. "We didn't feel obligated to include him in the planning."{...}

See? Dear old Asshat knew that his neighbors were planning a remodel. He just didn't care until it impeded his view of open space---open space that just happens to be owned by his neighbors. And what about that view, eh? Roll that beautiful bean footage!

See, apparently you're only allowed to use all the space on your lot if you're Garrison Keillor. The little people next door shall not, apparently, be allowed to expand upon land they own because it means dear old Garrison might feel claustrophobic, in his residence, in the middle of a historic neighborhood that's not necessarily known for its overwhelmingly gargantuan lots to begin with.

Go read the rest of the article if you can stomach it.

This is becoming one of those issues here in the urban areas of the Twin Cities---people expanding their homes in a large way, or completely knocking older homes down to build a bigger, more modern home on a lot with existing trees. The lots here are not large, and some of these homes, do, indeed, look like they've been shoehorned in, despite most builders best efforts. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. The City of Minneapolis has been toying with the notion of not allowing this to happen anymore, even though it's a proven fact that said homes add to property values. In fact, here in Cake Eater Land, which is one of the older suburbs in the Cities, there is a moratorium on knock-downs in place for one of our older, richer, neighborhoods, until April. Another neighborhood tried to latch onto that moratorium this fall and their measure failed, in part, because contracted home sales were falling through left and right simply at the threat of a moratorium on rebuilds. People want larger houses these days. We lead different lives today than we did when these homes were originally built---and those different lives require more space than what is on offer. I see absolutely no problem with remodeling or knocking down a home on land that you own. The overall aesthetics of a neighborhood should not trump an individual's property rights. It doesn't matter if the proposed house rebuild/remodel is hideous. If someone wants to amend their property, they should be able to do it as they see fit, even if it pisses off the neighbors. That's not going to stop some people, though, Garrison Keillor being one of them.

I have no doubts that, sometime in the future, Keillor will try and make his lawsuit against his neighbors, who have done everything the way they're supposed to do it, part of this larger debate. He throw his weight around, and people who have no cause to be ticked off about this issue, will side with him. Because he's Garrison Keillor, and everyone knows he's a defender of all things good and above average here in Minnesota.

You, know, except for things which restrict his view.

Posted by Kathy at January 16, 2008 11:02 AM | TrackBack