I've Never Been To Jersey

And there's no wistfulness attached to that statement, but I've always thought the place must be pretty kitschy, given that it's home to Tony Soprano, Kevin Smith, Alfred Einstein and, last but not least, Fausta.

Turns out I was right:

TRENTON, N.J. - With curious officeworkers gawking and strip-bar standards playing in the background, several hundred people joined a handful of exotic dancers in front of the Statehouse on Thursday to rally against New Jersey's new indoor smoking ban.

About 20 of the women — who, to the disappointment of some in the crowd, didn't reveal anything more risque than their midriffs — said the ban will result in lost clients and lost money.

"It's going to murder our business," said Dominique Hernandez, 24, who dances at a lounge in Florence. "A lot of people want to get off of work, have a drink and a smoke and watch some pretty girls. There's nothing wrong with that."

Apparently not, judging by the looks Hernandez — in tight jeans and a revealing black T-shirt — received from onlookers.

"I'm just passing by on the way to the office," was the refrain from many men, and some women, in the crowd.

But many said they came to protest the smoking ban, saying it was a violation of their rights.

"I've been a smoker since I was 13 and it's really against our rights," said Allan Brophy, 24, of Union. "Pretty soon they're going to be outlawing it in our houses."

Brophy did admit that word of strippers at the rally had "piqued my interest."{...}

Strippers, who are being hit in the G-string by yet another smoking ban, are out there, fighting for their fiscal survival. God love 'em.