The Book of Lamentations

As told by one Tara Reid:

NEW YORK - Tara Reid wants to prove she's a great actress instead of a party girl. The actress says the media has unfairly represented her and that she just needs a good movie to break the stereotype.

"I think there must be a journalist school where students are taught how to kill Tara Reid," the 29-year-old actress says in a Steppin' Out magazine issue on newsstands Oct. 12.

"The one thing I want to say about American journalists is: why is partying and having a good time bad?" Reid says. "And how come when someone else gets messed up or is a junkie or gets DUI'd and goes to rehab and is considered a hero again?"

Reid says she doesn't plan to go that route because she'd be "admitting guilt for something I'm not guilty of." Instead, she has fired her publicist and hopes to find a good role because the 'wild girl' reputation is hurting her career.

"I need one more great movie role so they say, `Wow, she can act! She's a great actress.' Then I think they'll leave me alone."

She needs one more great movie role so they say "she's a great actress!" Sweetheart, you'd need to have at least one decent role TO BEGIN WITH before you can say you need one more. American Pie was a funny movie, but your role in it? Well, let's just say you weren't at band camp that summer, were ya? Nope. I loved the scene in AP where your character lost her virginity. A cabbage would have done a better acting job. The green leaves and folds just lend themselves to emoting, wouldn't you agree? Which is more than I can say for you: you looked mildly constipated. Until you actually go out and learn how to act---which I can only imagine will cut into your hangover recovery time---you will be unable to get those nasty paparazzi get off your back so you can snort coke/let your tit hang out/get drunk/screw boy toys with impunity.