Not because they're affecting me other than making me pay through the nose for produce. No sirreee. We could not have picked a better time to go car-less. No, what I am referring to is the new and somewhat unusual habit of everyone and their brother of driving mopeds around town.
This is annoying.
Now, I don't mind the new little Vespas. These are actually cute and they don't make noise. But these Vespas have, it seems, started a trend wherein people are pulling long unused, twenty-year-old Honda mopeds out of their garages and are firing them up for transportation purposes.
It sounds like people are driving chainsaws up and down my street.
Now, I can understand why, with gas at $2.20 a gallon, it would be nice to have an alternative---and cheap---form of transportation with which to accomplish your daily running around. Particularly when the weather is agreeing with the desire to rattle around on a moped. But seriously, folks. If the thing is put-put-put-putting along, you might want to get the engine checked, ya dig? You might also want to---and this is just a suggestion, mind you, so don't shoot the messenger---get the engine checked if said moped is emitting loads of black smoke. You're burning whatever small amount of oil it takes to keep one of those things running and it STINKS.
Also, it might behoove you to learn how to drive the stupid things. Just because you have a small moped and can whiz around with ease, does NOT mean you get to jump a curb and drive along the sidewalk when traffic is heavy. This also means if you're going to turn right on a red, well, don't mow down the people in the crosswalks, thinking we can get out of your way more easily than you can get out of ours. PEDESTRIANS HAVE THE RIGHT OF WAY. Learn this or I will not be held accountable for my actions, ya dig?
Ok, I feel better now.
Posted by Kathy at July 22, 2005 11:54 AM | TrackBackMopeds. Speaking as a biker, I say that you should refer to these creatures as "peds", since I am not willing to share the letters M and O with them.
Face it, if you're over 16 and under 65, you should NOT ride a moped. Purchase a small motorcycle, or even get a Whizzer (basically a "Pee-Wee Hermanesque" Schwinn frame with a friction motor mounted on the back - the only "acceptable" mo-varmint IMHO) instead of those godawful wheeled chainsaws.
An Enfield 500cc motorcycle manufactured in India gets you about 70 mpg, costs less than $4000 in base trim, and it's got some credibility with the "in" crowd on two wheels. These are imported by a company based in Faribault, so you should run around the neighborhood sticking the business card of this company to the mo-varmints with copious amounts of duct tape.
Yamahoppers and Honda Sprees should take their cues from disco & the pet rock and STAY IN THE SEVENTIES!!!
Posted by: Russ from Winterset at July 22, 2005 12:18 PM