June 14, 2005

A Bit of Navel Gazing For Your Enjoyment

You know, I'm really not a scary person. I know sometimes I come off like one, because this place is where I put a lot of my angst. But you shouldn't take it seriously. I'm not that frightening of a person. Really, I'm not. Most people think I'm really nice.

Except...

When someone tries to use me. Then I have to draw the damn line, because homey just don't play that. For those of you who are wondering what I'm going on about this time, well, it's this: I am getting exceedingly tired of bloggers who perhaps don't have a huge audience---and would like to gain one---tracking back to a post I've written on a similar subject WITHOUT LINKING ME. They're doing this to gain hits. To gain notoriety. I know that's the reason they're doing it, but it's---and I'm going to shout this so they get it the first fucking time---TACKY IN THE EXTREME. Your trackback will get deleted. Trust me on this one. Get your own damn audience, or at least get some balls and send me a promo email. If you want me to get angry, like I just did, try and sneak around me, assuming I won't care. Because, let me tell you kids, that's a surefire way to bring the heavens down upon you. But, really, if you want me to promote one of your posts, send me an email that goes something like this:

Hi Kathy,

I'm a fan of the Cake Eater Chronicles and I just wrote a post that dovetails nicely with one you wrote about such and such subject. Here's the link if you're interested in reading it.

Thanks for your time,

So and so blogger

Now, that wasn't so hard, was it? I may link you. I may not. You'll never know unless you try.

And just a super sekrit message to the dude who inspired this post: if you'd sent me an email, I would have linked to you. It was a good post. But now I won't because you tried to horn in on my blog and my traffic without giving me anything in return. It's pretty fucking simple. Blogging is, at best, a quid pro quo excursion. If you're not going to give, neither am I. Take your parasitic behavior and go elsewhere.

Posted by Kathy at June 14, 2005 03:36 PM
Comments

It was only with the greatest of self control that I did not link back to this post! :)

Posted by: RP at June 15, 2005 08:15 AM

Awww. You do realize that he'll never blog again in this town. Not that I know what town he's in...

Posted by: sadie at June 15, 2005 11:06 AM

You're talking about me aren't you?
I'm sorry.
I promise I won't do it again, I thought I had linked back, really I did. Honest. Can't we put this behind us and go back to the way things were before?

If I offer to wash your back will it make things all better?

It's because I'm fat isn't it?

I'm with RP on the self control bit, at least Steve-O didn't let us down.

Posted by: phin at June 15, 2005 11:34 AM

Wait, you have an audience worth stealing?

Posted by: ndh at June 15, 2005 11:50 AM

Phin---let's just say I'm the Kramer of this self-control contest. I've never been "Lord of the Blogging Manor."

Posted by: Steve the LLamabutcher at June 15, 2005 12:07 PM

See, that's the point, ndh...I don't have a huge audience.

I don't know why people do this sort of thing, when I'm actually pretty generous with what linky love I can offer.

Posted by: Kathy at June 15, 2005 12:18 PM

It happens to me fairly frequently. And it ticks me off! So, yeah, what you said!

Posted by: Ith at June 15, 2005 01:04 PM

I'm calling blog daughter privelege - I linked it.

I couldn't help myself. It was too funny!

Posted by: Phoenix at June 15, 2005 02:25 PM

That's some A++ quality navel gazing there, Kathy. I look forward to the next thrilling installment!

Posted by: charlie eklund at June 15, 2005 06:57 PM

You frighten me.

Now I'm gonna go trackback this post...and not link.

:)

Posted by: Kevin at June 15, 2005 10:55 PM

Well, people DO tell me I'm scary, but only if you have to work with me. I'm not proud of it, but who the hell is happy at work anyway?

Sigh.

I really think I'm taking the rest of the week off.

What was that about navel gazing? Oh, YOUR navel. I get it.

Me wonders if we suffered the same phenom from the same new local. I was going to be polite and send a friendly netiquette e-mail prompt. But, I've been too lazy this week, so the trackback is even still there.

But YOU just let 'er rip, which is what I like about you, come to think of it.

It's nice to think someone out there is scarier than me. :) I think I'll use it to threaten the hubby.

Posted by: Sandy at June 16, 2005 12:53 AM

What I hate is when someone comments with something like "go to my post" without ever really saying anything about the post I've written.

I don't mind someone leaving a comment and linking to their blog if they have written on the same subject, but at least really SAY something about what I've written.

Posted by: Rachel Ann at June 16, 2005 06:47 AM

I'm not a blogger, however a read a lot of blogs. What the hell is trackback anyway? Perhaps you could share with us less enlightened folks?? I've often wondered WTF that was for.

Posted by: Dude Hanz at June 16, 2005 09:19 AM

And that would be why I used the phrase "navel gazing" in the title, dude ;)

Trackback is a pretty simple thing once you get the hang of it. It works on the same principle as a submarine ping: remember that scene in Hunt for Red October where Ramius is asking for a ping to verify the distance to target? Well, trackback is pretty much the same thing, hence the usage of the word "ping," when referring to track back, as in "I pinged your blog." It's a tool that allows bloggers to know who's linked a particular post they've written. If you click on the trackback link up at the bottom of this post, you'll see all the people who have "tracked back," meaning they've linked this post on their own blogs. There are other ways of tracking who's linking to your blog, but they're time consuming and late. Trackback is quick and efficient and you usually know about it within a few minutes of being pinged. And all of this is made possible by an html link that's assigned to each and every post.

Now, some blogging software, like Movable Type (the one in use on this here blog) automatically tracks back to other MT blogs. When you link to them, it automatically pings their blog. You don't have to worry about it. Other blogging software, like Blogger, doesn't have automatic trackback, so if you want to trackback, you have to manually ping someone using a software add-on. Haloscan is the primary manual trackback software out there. Now, it's no big deal when someone links to a post you've written and then has manually tracked back, to let me know about it. This is considered to be the polite thing to do in terms of blogosphere etiquette. It lets me know who's linking me and I rather like knowing that. That's not what I'm talking about here. The problem comes in when someone doesn't link me, but tracks back to my post anyway, because it's on the same subject. There are any number of reasons why people would do this, but the main one is that they're looking for links. It's like putting an ad on my blog without my consent, without me getting anything in return. It's very rude.

I hope that explains it.

Posted by: Kathy at June 16, 2005 09:44 AM

I'm new to this blogging shit, so when I link to someone I'm supposed to email and let them know? Damn that's too much work, I'm never linking again!

Posted by: livey at June 16, 2005 01:51 PM

"Damn that's too much work, I'm never linking again!"

And thus we witness the end of your blog.

Posted by: jimg at June 16, 2005 07:58 PM

A lot of bloggers consider sending an email like you suggested, tacky. With everyone having their own set of rules how can anyone possibly know the right thing to do?

Posted by: Lynn S at June 17, 2005 09:14 AM

Good lord, that just seems incredibly petty to me. Of all the things to hyperventilate about.

Posted by: Jay at June 17, 2005 09:24 AM

I'm sure it does seem like a "petty" thing to "hyperventilate" about, Jay. Unless you have to deal with it over and over again. Which, for some strange reason, I do. Then it becomes a pain in the ass. The last thing any blogger wants to do is smack down a blogger who's getting their feet wet. It's not nice. And I don't really like doing it, but honestly, how much am I supposed to take? Particularly when this blogger pretty much acted like a some as*hole pr0n operator who floods my older posts on a regular basis with comment and trackback spam. Which I then have to go in and delete and then rebuild my site, which hangs things up for my readers. I mean, is that a cool thing to do? Is that how this blogger really wants to get more traffic to their site? By being an a**hole?

If that's "petty" of me, well, then so be it. Get a blog and you, too, will know that running one takes work.

Posted by: Kathy at June 17, 2005 10:23 AM

Thanks but I would rather not.

It's sounds like stress I would rather not have. And work. I'm not a really a lazy person, but if it's work (as opposed to fun) then I like to see results. I don't see much concrete benefit to expending that level of energy.

Anyway, I digress. Focus your anger and frustration elsewhere. I am not your enemy, just some random guy who wandered by to say hello. Relax. My god. There are mountains, and there are molehills. And frankly, who is (not) tracking back to your blog.... is a molehill.

Posted by: Jay at June 17, 2005 12:57 PM

Sorry, Jay. Didn't mean to make it seem like I was aiming both barrels at you. I apologize.

Not that it's an excuse, but I'm having a cranky sort of day.

Posted by: Kathy at June 17, 2005 01:40 PM

question: what would be the appropriate etiquette for someone who links to you? for example, big fish links to small fish. does small fish return the favor by linking big fish coupled with a trackback?

im trying to learn.

Posted by: Dr. Zubov at June 30, 2005 12:19 PM
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