That Mac users need help, but here it is anyway.
{...}The fact that we have an entry today is a testament to Tiger, the new Mac OS. Friday night I went to the Mall (took Gnat, so she may have a dim memory of these wondrous times) to get OS X 10.4, promising her we’d get ice cream. Here’s a sign of how much Apple-flavored Kool-Aid I’ve consumed: as we approached the store I noted the jam-packed parking lot and thought gee, I hope they’re not all here for the new operating system – what if they’ve run out? (It was seven PM, one hour after they’d opened the doors.) Then I realized that most people were here for crude, base things like movies or meals, and relaxed. There was a cattle-chute marked off my ropes that had contained the mob until six; one employee told me people had been queued since three. Three hundred and fifty people were waiting when they opened the doors. At the Mall of America, the line stretched halfway down the length of the Mall, which is no small accomplishment. All this for widgets?Yes. Yes, indeed. That’s why we’re here: widgets. The new OS has a handy little feature called “Dashboard” – hit F12, and the screen fills with mini-apps of varying usefulness. I don’t need an analogue clock, for example. The FedEx tracking widget will come in handy someday. The Flight Tracker widget, which displays flight speed, position, arrival time, is cool beyond measure. But there’s a dictionary widget, a phone book, a weather program, and an FTP widget that makes uploading this site a thing of beauty – I just hit F12, drag the file to the widget, and voila. In the old days I opened the program, logged in, navigated to the proper folder, and dragged it over: four steps. FOUR! This is 2005: I don’t have time for four steps. Now it’s two steps. I will spend the extra time learning how to sculpt marble.{...}
Dude. We Windows users also have "widgets." It's called Google. All of those lovely tricks and treats you silly Mac users lined up for hours for on Friday are available in Google. Want to track a flight? Just enter the flight number in to Google and the information will pop up. Want to track a UPS or FedEx package? Just type the number into the Google engine and VOILA! There's your information.
That these people waited in line for hours and PAID FOR stuff they could get for free means they are officially in need of deprogramming at a de-culting center somewhere in the middle of nowhere. Neither should they be let back into society without a court order confirming said de-culting is complete.
I've mentioned before that Lileks' mall is my mall. Whenever we're down there, I cannot help but note that there's an oxygen bar right next door to the Apple Store. It's times like this when I'm absolutely, positively sure the oxygen bar's tanks are leaking.
Posted by Kathy at May 2, 2005 12:39 PM